A Garden of Fruit Producing Trees and Plants


The first time almost everyone climbs a tree, there are certain to be some humiliating mishaps. Nobody can become an expert overnight; we all make errors, some of which come back to haunt us years after we’ve committed them. However, some of us are more prone to making errors than others. I believe that if there were a prize given out for the most naive individual who ever attempted to cultivate a tree, I would be the one to take home the trophy.

When I made the decision to cultivate my own tree, I immediately envisioned the ideal location for it. About five feet of space was left unoccupied between my home and the boundary fence that surrounded it. Because it was probably the part of my yard that saw the fewest visitors, I felt that it needed a little bit more to make it more interesting. It’s possible that if I made it more comfortable with some nice shade, my family might utilize it more often. I had an idea of a little paradise for a picnic in the shade where my family could go to spend time together and connect with the natural world. Holy cow, I sure was wrong.

I thought a lovely apple tree would be a good choice. Even though there was a possibility that apples would fall on our heads, I thought it would be a joy to sit beneath the shade and feast on wonderful apples that were produced on our own property. Just the idea of taking part in such an emotional and romantic endeavor was sufficient to motivate me to go to the nursery by myself and buy the first apple tree I saw there. My knowledge of trees was insufficient to allow me to examine the tree’s roots or any of the other potential warning signals that it could be sick. I forked out the necessary sum of cash and had the Christmas tree brought to my residence by a delivery service.

I positioned the hole precisely where I wanted the tree to be planted. This consumed the better part of the remainder of the day. It is quite simple to underestimate the significance of holes. It’s simple to assume that digging a hole won’t take more than an hour or two, but once you get started, you’ll likely find that the process moves at a much more snail’s-pace pace than you had anticipated. When I finally got the hole to be large enough to accommodate the ball of roots, I definitely did not feel like digging additional few feet around the outside of the hole, as is suggested by the majority of tree planting manuals. I had almost finished positioning the tree when you called. I was able to move the tree across the yard and place it in the hole thanks to the assistance of my morbidly fat next-door neighbor. The void, at that point, needed to be filled up.

After I finished filling in that final shovel load of soil, I couldn’t have been happier in any other situation. I took a step back to survey my handiwork. At that moment, my daughter, who was three at the time, said something that knocked the wind out of me and continues to do so to this day. “Daddy, look how tall that tree is! It’s like grandfather!” If she had likened my father or any other part of the tree to any other feature of him, I would have considered it an honor. My father is a terrific guy. However, as of late, he has been experiencing worsening back pain, and as a result, he is unable to stand up very straight. I became aware that the position of my tree was, in fact, rather like to that of his.

I had the impression that this was an issue that the tree will eventually mature out of, so I decided to give it some time and see what the outcome is. I went outside on a daily basis to monitor the development of the tree and to determine whether or not it had become any straighter since the previous day. When I realized that the situation had not improved in any way, it consistently brought me down. I made the decision to put it out of my mind since I did not want to go through the trouble of removing it from my backyard. I made it a point to avoid going over to that side of the house ever again, and I tried my best to put the tree out of my mind. I made the decision that in the event that keeping the tree in that location caused any kind of issue in the future, I would immediately pack up my belongings and leave the state. That is how much my embarrassing encounter in the tree made me feel like a fool.

When I was sitting in my home one day, I heard a tremendous crash outside and realized that it had been roughly three years since I had even acknowledged that the tree had ever been. I was curious as to what the issue was, so I hurried outside to investigate. When I got there, I saw that my tree had reached an unacceptable size, and as a result, it had destroyed my gutter as well as a portion of my neighbor’s fence. Within a week, I had relocated out of the state.

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